marriage

by humanmama on May 28, 2014

This is a post from last year that still applies today. Little by little, people who love each other and want to commit their lives to each other are being allowed to. And it’s going to happen everywhere–mark my words, it’s just a matter of time. So do me a favor and just keep living your life in peace, whatever you beliefs may be. And let’s let everyone else do the same.

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“Mawwage.” Everytime I see the word I can”t stop the voice of that priest in The Princess Bride:

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But its something I’ve seen a million times this week, in a million FB posts and a million tweets. Marriage inequality. Marriage equality. Rights. Freedoms. Upholding. Overturning. In a lot of posts by my friends, they’re excited to see the possibility of our country moving forward with change. With granting everyone the right to get married to the person they choose. In other posts, people are afraid. Of change, of sin, of the unknown.

Most people I know that aren’t sure there should be legal gay marriage are Christian and are operating from a feeling that homosexuality is a sin. Some of those people are straight, and I know a couple of people who are still in the closet but believe that how they feel is a sin, and therefore don’t want others who feel the way they do to get married (and perpetrate the sin). Since the majority of the people I know who are against the legalization of gay marriage are Christian, Jewish, or Muslim, here’s a few excerpts from the Bible, in case you’re on the fence, about marriage between a man and a man, or a woman and another woman:

Hmm. Well, there really isn’t anything about gay marriage specifically in the Bible. Let’s try the Koran (Quran/ Qu’ran):

Okay, well, I guess nothing in there about gay marriage either. Don’t get me wrong! There are plenty of verses in the Bible, Torah, and Qu’ran that lead the reader to believe that “people of the nation of Lot/Lut” are doing the wrong thing, which is implied as [homosexual acts]. Nothing with two people who love each other and want to get married. Nothing that says don’t commit your life to one another even if you’re the same gender. Here’s a really interesting quote from the Bible about [not otherwise specified] marriage, though:

Now for the matters you wrote about: It is good for a man not to marry.  But since there is so much immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband.  The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband.  The wife’s body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband’s body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife.  Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.  I say this as a concession, not as a command.  I wish that all men were as I am. But each man has his own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that.  Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am.  But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.  To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband.  But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.  To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her.  And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him.  For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.  But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace…. (1 Corinthians, 7:1-16)

So that’s a lot of stuff. But it’s in the Bible. And what I get out of that? What I take from that whole big shabang of marriage information written by the Apostle Paul but breathed by the Lord, is that it is better to marry than to burn with passion. And that spouses should be together and it will keep them from being tempted (here together is implied as in bed). And of COURSE Paul writes woman/husband and man/wife because that’s the common language. And also, who knows what the exact translations were, since it was really written in…what?…Aramaic? But there’s one thing that really sticks out in that passage. The reminder that God has called us to live in peace.

Maybe it’s really the naming of things that has gotten people so upset. Maybe in the origins of this country, everyone who wanted to be joined together who is a legal and consenting adult should file paperwork to get a license. Then, if they want to join the Church of the Gay-Hating Avengers and have a ceremony, that could be called a wedding. But it would be different than the license to join together that the feds or the state granted them. And, if they wanted to have an all-inclusive wedding ceremony in Timbuktu, or join the Group That Loves All Others No Matter What, or do something quiet with just their family in the backyard, or maybe have a black Goth circus wedding extravaganza, they could do that too. But it would be separate from the license and paperwork they had to file to join all their farms and livestock and get the estate, should their partner die.

So in peace I say to you, please. Do not deny others the rights to which you yourself are entitled to. History will keep marching on, with or without us, and some day the fact that people who are committed and in love and together but gay and can’t get married will be just about as senseless and ridiculous as some of the other black eyes of our country. If you want to keep marriage for just the Straights, get involved in a gay-hating church! Have a wedding with just straight men and straight women and NO GAYS! Exclude people all you want. Let’s say that from here on out if you want to have a wedding in a church that THINKS GAY IS TOTALLY HORRIFIC, you can do it. Go ahead!! But if someone who is gay wants to marry their partner? Let them do it how they want. Let them file the appropriate paperwork. Let them get a license. Let them be protected by the same laws as the rest of the married people. Let them be subject to the same rights and regulations. (And, some would argue, same problems.) And you go right ahead and stay in your church that hates them. Write angry letters to them (I CAN’T BELIEVE you CHOOSE to like someone with the SAME GENITALS AS YOU!! EW!). It might be childish, yes. Maybe foolish. Certainly not something Jesus would do (“Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.” Luke 6:37 NIV). But, still, it’s a free country.

God has called us to live in peace. That applies to so much today. Let others do what they shall; don’t interfere with their rights. Hate all you want, but let others live with the same rights you live with. Please.

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