family rules

by humanmama on May 27, 2013

I just bought a sign. It was on sale, in the picture/housewares section of Marshall’s, and it reads “Family Rules.”

Good rules, right? Well, after this weekend with family, it was a good reminder of the things that are important to me and my family. Being a child of a divorce, when I was little I often dreamed of the day when I would be able to raise my own family the way I wanted to. Part of the dream was what would happen every day (up/ breakfast together/ learn/ play/ husband come home/ family eat dinner together/ laughing/ singing/ lots of music). Note that I thought I would stay at home with my kids. I thought I might even home school them, just to be together and laughing and learning all the time.

That didn’t happen. Not all of it. I don’t home school. I sometimes work. I often yearn for alone time. I don’t always spend all my days learning and laughing. Sometimes I spend them thinking of babysitters. But, more often than not, we do have music. We do have laughter. We do have togetherness.

So I thought of some new “family rules” to add to my picture.

~music: we sing, we dance, we listen
~we respect each others’ feelings and communicate our own
~we choose happiness (even when it’s really hard) and focus on what we do have and on how totally blessed and lucky we are and not on just the things we want
~we are kind.
My sign says “use kind words,” but we are more than that. We don’t hurt others. We say “I’m sorry” when we do. We admit when we are wrong. We search to see others’ points of view to understand them. We try to understand
~we are loving. That means to everyone. That means to whomever scares you, too. Whomever makes you uncomfortable. The people who challenge you and press your buttons, as well as Mother Theresa and your grandma. That means taking every single thought you have about what that person with the tattoos and scary accent is about that you got from just looking at them and challenging it. That means supporting love, marriage, kindness, and goodness. That means saying simply “I do not agree and we believe in love” to people who do not feel this way, but still showing even those people love.

And, pretty much, that’s our family rules. What are yours?

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