don’t worry, about a thing

by humanmama on February 15, 2012

There are so many things I worry about as a mom that I never, ever would have batted an eye over when I was kidless. At the very same time, I’m not a huge worrier, and sometimes when I have gone to the playgrounds with other mommies they’ve made the “reach out and grab and gasp” motion while watching my kids, and I just shrug and say, “Well, they’re really good climbers.” It’s good to have a high tolerance for worry if you’re a mom–it helps, since there’s so much to worry about. But still, ask Carpenter, and he’ll tell you I’m about a million and forty times crazier and more anal and controlling of things around here than humanmama before kids. That’s BK, whereas this year marks 5 AK. After kids. That’s how we measure time around here.

I find myself thinking about their high school boyfriends. (Or girlfriends for all I know.) I think about their cell phones and where I’ll hide them each night so they can’t stay up ’til 3am texting everyone they know. Or maybe I won’t get them cellphones and they’ll be those girls without the phones and I’ll make them wear buttoned-up shirts and never cut their hair and sew their own clothes.

Okay, granted, that might be a little extreme.

I think about why we eat so much, and how rich (and I actually do mean flat-out wealthy) we’d be if we didn’t eat. I swear, I’d save so much money. But alas, we have to eat to live, and that means we need those food bills. I think about why in the hell ground beef cones in poundage like 0.87 lbs. and 1.21 lbs, but never just frickin’ 1.0 lbs. Haven’t those butchers ever made any recipe on earth!?

I don’t worry about things that I maybe should. Like getting them into a trillion activities right now while their developing mind could grasp six new languages and four instruments and seventeen sports. Although I often think, now would be the time for some of those things, we can only afford one or two things, and for now we’ll stick with what we love. Helena tried gymnastics last year and I’ve never seen her so focused or right-on in her life, she gives 110% every class and often the instructors tell me she’s amazing at it. I asked her “what did they say to you today?” on her first day there, and she made a scissors motion with her hands and said “They told me I’m ‘cut out.'”

I don’t worry if they’re potty trained or sleeping well anymore. I did worry about that all the time when our first was a baby, but now I realize that both those things pretty much come in phases. That doesn’t mean I don’t worry about me dying of old age in about six weeks Lilly keeps getting up at 5am, but it does mean that I know this too shall pass. I also know that one day, maybe it will be in their teenage years, but one day they’ll sleep in longer than I do. And that, my friends, that shall be a day of celebration.

There’s a lot of things you can worry about in life. I’m learning that it wears me down a lot quicker than it wears down the problem, though, to worry about it forever. Just face it head on, I say, and know that this too shall pass. And there will be celebration–even if it only means sleeping until 6:30.


 

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